i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize