I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
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