I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize