She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
