Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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