i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
