im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
