I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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