I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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