Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I fill condoms, not promises.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize