but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
she smelled like a LAN party
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
