how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize