the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
