In the future we'll all be gay
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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