In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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