Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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