I want to make a zoo with you.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize