i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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