Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
