I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Randomize