no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Randomize
