we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
