Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
