Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize