Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
