He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
