It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
