I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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