the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
