We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
