No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
