you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
