He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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