Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(505): View more from New Mexico

The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.

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(510): View more from California

I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like

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(770): View more from Georgia

I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.

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(330): View more from Ohio

not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?

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(619): View more from California

he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up

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(708): View more from Illinois

Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.

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(513): View more from Ohio

I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.

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