We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Vodka?
Forever.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Randomize
