apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
