My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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