you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
