with your own penis?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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