You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
