Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
