Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
