Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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