Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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