I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
