I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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