dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Congratulations! We have a period
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
