it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Do vagina's smell?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I have aggressive nipples.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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