ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
this hospital has no fireball
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
