Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
