put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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